A Mile In My Shoes

I had no more than 3 hour stretches of sleep for over 4 weeks.
I had a baby chomping on my breasts for . . . well, she is still chomping on my breasts. They are constantly bruised, sensitive, and painful. This does not seem to improve, despite the fact that everyone says it "gets better" and that I have done everything that the breastfeeding experts say to do to correct it.
Even when I do get an evening away, I still have to pump. Trust me, that does not encourage relaxation.
I wake up from between 5:30 am and 8:00 am. I stay all day with them, I spend four hours a day, just with her on the boob. The rest of the time, I am holding her while she cries, or walking her, or rocking her, or cleaning her blowout poops. And at 8:00 pm, the toddler is still awake. She doesn't fall asleep until 11:00 pm. We're talking 15 hr days here. Sure people work 15 hr days all the time. But without a weekend break? Every day is the same. The only difference is that I am not alone on the weekends. What if you had to go into the office 7 days a week for 8 weeks straight?

I am not belittling what is done to help me, but there is something about being constantly on call that is exhausting. It is lonely. I wish you wouldn't judge me until you have walked a mile in my shoes.

It actually really is that hard.